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Expert answers to 7 tricky bridesmaid situations

Bridemaids

Bridesmaids are the women who share the stage with you on your wedding day. This is a position that you should confer after thoroughly thinking it through. This is because they have an important role to play at your wedding; it is one where they will have to handle several responsibilities.

However careful or calculating you may be when choosing your bridesmaids, you can still end up with unexpected surprises or awkward situations in this area at different stages of the wedding planning process. Sometimes, the issues may crop up right from the time you start choosing your bridesmaids, at other times it may be an issue that suddenly popped up when you thought everything was progressing beautifully.

Bridesmaids
Image Credits: Micadew, via Flickr, CC BY 2.0

 

Here are some issues that brides have had to tide over, and let us look at the best way to handle each of them.

Q. Who to choose when you have more than one Bestie?

Enter Friends, with Monica who had to choose between Rachel and Phoebe, or Jules on Cougar Town with Ellie and Laurie! This is a situation we’ve seen time and again. If you have always been certain of who to choose as your Maid of Honor, and its been mutually agreed upon, lucky you! If not, do not worry, we have a few solutions for you to consider.

  • Leave it to the girls to decide among themselves, if you think that is the best approach. Of course, be prepared to go with whoever they decide to choose, if you take this route.
  • Ask them both. There is no problem with having two Maids of Honor, and it can perhaps be easier on them too as they can share the responsibilities and you needn’t feel guilty about your decision. This is the easiest and most practical approach, especially if you seem to be getting nowhere with making a choice.
  • If you have a sibling who you trust to take care of everything well, it is best to ask her and avoid stressing over it further. This will also save you from the problem of choosing between friends.
  • When considering your choices, give priority to responsibility, availability and organizing ability. Remember your maid of honor should be available and able to make things easier for you, and not just someone you choose so she is happy.

Q. What to do if a bridesmaid is pregnant or a new mom at the time of the wedding

Since you’ll be engaged for a long time, don’t expect all your bridesmaids to be in their current situations at the time of your wedding. They may or may not! However, having a bridesmaid who is pregnant or a new mom doesn’t have to change too many things. The best approach in this situation is to ask her what she would be comfortable doing. If your friend would still love to continue being your bridesmaid, trust her with it. If she is nervous and would prefer to back out, it is best to go with her choice. If your friend would like to continue in the role, make sure you do all you can so she is comfortable. You may have to make a few changes to plan when ordering her dress. It may have to be altered or you may have to choose it closer to the wedding. So, plan the logistics accordingly. Also, entrust her with light responsibilities, given her situation. She will already be handling a hundred extra things of her own, so don’t stress her out with more than she can handle. Just talk to her and find out all you can about how you can make things easy for her, and we are sure it will all work out well for both of you.

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Q. When your bridesmaids hate the dress you chose

It is impossible to make everyone happy, and yes, it is your happiness that ultimately matters. So, if your choice for the bridesmaids dress doesn’t find favor with the girls, you can still stick to it. All the same, remember that there are several ways in which you can work around this and find a choice that they can be happier about.

Many brides make the mistake of choosing bridesmaids dresses in unusual colors, that many girls find unappealing. The mix and match bridesmaids look is one of the best ways to tide over this issue and get you what you want, while your bridesmaids are also happy. You can keep two or three factors uniform, like the color, neckline, hemline or designer collection, and allow your girls to choose any dress they like as long as these factors are met. Find out how to do this right, by checking out this previous article of ours. The other way is to go with a neutral color or universally flattering pattern and step up the style with colorful accessories or bold fashion items. Here are some suggestions for some colors that work this way in this post.

Spend some time researching your options and be open to ideas that fit in with your wedding aesthetic. You may not only find a choice that everyone adores, but it may also give you something unique that sets your wedding apart. Also ask your bridesmaids if they have any suggestions and then make a choice that nobody can totally hate. This way, you’ll be happy and so will your bridesmaids.

Pantone colors

Q. Your bridesmaids think they are paying too much for everything

When a bridesmaid agrees to be one, she knows she signs up to spend some money for your wedding. So, it is part of the deal. Nevertheless, it is up to you to be reasonable about what you choose, so you don’t make your friends regret their decision later. This bridesmaid voices her concerns, in this post on Apartment Therapy, and she tells us how difficult it is for her to cough up all the money she is expected to spend for her friend.

Remember that this applies to your bridesmaids too. They have to pay for a dress which they may never wear again, pay for the bridal shower and wedding gift, hair, makeup, accessories, and these things can quickly add up. So, if you value your friendship, it is only right that you are understanding and either stick to reasonable plans where they have to pay only what they can afford, or volunteer to pay for anything extravagant. The best approach is to have options for everything from the dress to the gift, and allow them to pick from the choices based on their comfort. Your wedding shouldn’t leave any of your friends in a financial crunch, and unless you have been on the receiving end with the same friends previously, it is only wrong if you do. If you think the dress price exceeded your idea, or if they have paid more than they expected to, you can always buy them their accessories like shoes or jewelry and take that burden off them. They deserve it for all the hard work (and money!) they are putting in to make your day extra-special.

Q. What to do when one of my bridesmaids just doesn’t get along with the rest

Your bridesmaids are a team, and they do have to spend some time together to plan their roles and responsibilities properly. Having a bossy bridesmaid or one who always seems to disagree with the rest can throw the entire situation into chaos. So, the first step is to recognize the likelihood of any such problems arising, before you pop your question to your bridesmaids. If there is a difficult friend in your list, consider whether it is more important that they be a bridesmaid than avoiding arguments among your bridesmaids. If you think it is, you may have to take on an active role to avoid potential problems. This article on Huffington post gives some practical solutions in this regard. Firstly, avoid tricky situations that can lead to friction.  You can delegate responsibilities like the shower to a particular person, even outside the bridesmaid group to avoid arguments. Delegate only specific responsibilities to her, so she won’t have to cross paths with an opponent. Pair her off with those who can handle her with tact. Finally, before your wedding day, sit her down and personally ask her to put aside her differences and cooperate, so your day goes well. If she cares even an ounce for your happiness, she will handle it well and make sure that the excitement of your day is not ruined due to her petty and unnecessary problems.mix ‘n’ match bridesmaids dress

Q. What to do when a bridesmaid can’t keep the wedding planning details a secret

Whether it is because she is super-excited about your wedding, or simply jealous of what you have, it is simply wrong to tell others your wedding planning secrets. If your bridesmaid does this by mistake, let it go, but make sure to ask her nicely to never repeat it. Despite this, if she continues with gossiping, it may be better if you act immediately. If you wait too long, she can cause your wedding surprises to be ruined by her inconsiderate behavior. Aim for a solution where you involve only those who can keep their thoughts to themselves, in the planning. Don’t make it into a bitter problem and spoil the entire mood by arguing with the person who spills the beans every time. Be discrete and don’t give any details if she keeps asking you for what’s going on. If you want to handle it diplomatically, and not create any unpleasant situations, assign a generic project to her and leave her with it. Make sure it is one that won’t make a difference even if she goes around telling the town what is involved, and it’ll keep her busy from interfering with the rest.girls-685787_1280

 

Q. Is it alright if my bridesmaid lives far away and will be arriving just in time for the wedding

This isn’t too rare these days. After all, you may have friends right from the time you were a little girl, who are close to you despite the physical distance. Although it may not be easy to shop for the bridesmaid dress or plan the shower from long-distance, it is still possible. Where dress shopping is concerned, you can simply mail her the options or share links to the collection online, and ask her for her opinions. Once the choice is made, you should order it for her, along with the dresses for your other bridesmaids. For this you need to know her dress size. Make sure that your bridesmaid is measured by a professional seamstress, so you get the measurements right before ordering the dress. Since you will mostly be ordering all the bridesmaids dresses in one go and from the same dye lot, make sure you know this before you place the order. Once the dress arrives, ship it to her right away. This will allow her to get the alterations done, so it is ready to be worn when she travels for the wedding. Where the bachelorette parties and bridal showers are concerned, it is up to your maid of honor and other bridesmaids to plan it. If you would like her to attend, see if it is possible to move these events closer to the wedding date. Since you want her to be involved in the wedding as much as the rest of the wedding party is, you can consider designating some day-of tasks to her. Nevertheless, remember that she may be tired from the journey and so accommodate that factor into the plans as well.

Now that we have most of the tricky questions addressed here, we think you are covered for most scenarios. If you think there are any more likely situations that you want help with, write to us and let us know.

For your bridesmaids dresses, we suggest you take a look at our extensive collection of bridesmaids dresses here on Best for Bride. With exhaustive collections in all sizes and designs from leading designer brands, you are bound to find the right dresses for all your bridesmaids by visiting us.

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8 ways to make the most of your wedding cake budget

Most guests will look forward to enjoying that delicious sweet last course of wedding cake at your reception. Wedding cakes are works of art, created with finesse and customized with unique details of unparalleled beauty. Most wedding cakes today are not only a treat for the taste buds, but are a sensationally striking too. However, these masterpieces of sweet indulgence take time, effort and resources to create. It is no wonder that they are pricey and take up a chunk of your wedding budget.

Fortunately, there are creative ways to have your dream wedding cake without breaking the bank. This is what we will look at today. Read on to find out ten different ways to slice your wedding cake budget, and still get what you want.

#1 Choose a simple cake

love pinch couple figurine

It is the time and effort that goes into creating your wedding cake, that translates into a higher cost. Agreed that hand-crafted details look fabulous, but they will cost you accordingly. Fine lace-like details and intricate motifs will cost more than plain designs or those that are easy to do. Almost every design that you want on your cake will have an equally appealing alternative that costs less. Just make sure you ask your baker and find out.

For example, instead of individual sugar flowers that have to be made one-at-a-time, and perfected to the last detail, you can choose flat flowers of a single solid color. This saves your baker several hours of time, and you will get it at a much lesser price. Similarly, consider stencil prints or monograms instead of hand-piped details. Accessories like satin ribbons in a chosen color can instantly dress up a cake, and are easy on the pocket.

#2 Check out the budget-friendly options if you must have sugar flowers

fresh flowers on cake

Flowers are a trending favorite, and most brides choose to have at least few flowers or floral motifs on their wedding cake. Sugar flowers resembling real ones are very expensive, as your talented baker has a difficult job perfecting it. Each flower that is a replica of a real model involves several details, and depending on the complexity of the design, can take hours to do. Luckily, you have some equally attractive options to obtain the same effect for far less. Here they are:

  • Choose real flowers: Check with your florist for seasonal flowers that are non-poisonous and can be used on your wedding cake. It will cost less, and it will look splendid. All it takes is a little planning and organizing to get the flowers on time and set them up right.
  • Choose flat flowers or painted flowers for a similar effect: Flat flower designs without many layers, or those that are painted on to the cake cost far less than sugar flowers. So, this may be the way to go, to help your budget.
  • Choose simple designs: If you still want sugar flowers without the outrageous price, choose simple designs like lilies that are easier to make, than roses or orchids.
  • Keep it to a minimum: To avoid the hefty price tag for decorating your entire cake with it, choose a design with a cluster of flowers on just one tier instead. You could restrict the flowers to just the top tier or use it as a stem along the side of the cake, and decorate the rest with other inexpensive accessories.

#3 Opt for the economical option in frosting

buttercream cake

Fondant cakes are a delight, with their clear and remarkably soft texture, but they can be expensive. Fondant is considered the best cake decoration material for creative designs like ruffles and little figurines, with the added advantage that it has a marshmallow taste that almost everyone enjoys. If you choose a complicated design, or want the cake to look smooth and polished with a glazing finish, your baker may ask you to go with fondant. Although fondant gives the cake a refined finish, and it is easier to work with for precise measurements and details, it can cost several times that of butter-cream. This is why—to create a fondant covering for your cake, your baker has to first slather layers of butter-cream on the cake surface. It is to this that the fondant adheres. So, this means that you will be paying for both the butter-cream layer and the fondant topping.

Another factor is that fondant, whether made by the baker himself, or bought, is always costlier than butter-cream icing. The soft butter-cream is usually made from scratch, and is easier to do, and so the lesser price attached to it. Don’t think that you will lose out on taste or look by choosing it. It has been the traditional choice that has never disappointed. It can also be done in different colors, and a skilled cake-maker can design it to look as attractive as a fondant cake. Another budget-friendly option is to go with the current trend of naked cakes. Here, the cake layers are not frosted, and it is sparingly decorated with cream, fruits and berries for a natural, refreshing look.

#4 Make friends with faux tiers or choose a smaller display

wedding cake

If you always wanted a big cake, you can have it without paying for all those extra tiers. After deciding how many tiers are actually needed to serve your guests, you can ask your baker to do some extra tiers that aren’t made of real cake. It will still be iced and decorated to match the design you have chosen for your cake, and nobody will notice the difference. As long as all your guests get a slice, who cares whether the rest of the tiers are real or not. Let it be your own little secret!

The other option is to choose a spectacular, but smaller display cake with one, two or three layers that look great. Couture cakes done on small scale are fantastic, and can look sophisticated and stylish. Keep this for the display at your reception. For the actual cake service, order kitchen cakes that will not be decorated, but will taste exactly like the original. This will be cut and served to the guests. This way, you will have to spend less, but your guests will still get a fantastic dessert. This article on the Bridal Guide website suggests that you can save up to fifty per cent by going this way, than choosing a big cake.

#5 Opt for smaller servings

slice of cake

Have you ever noticed how many of the guests leave a lot of cake behind on their plates, especially if there are other desserts too? Avoid wastage by asking your caterer to size the slices to three-fourth or half the original serving size, and serve it along with the other desserts. You can also have the cake slices placed in a buffet, instead of serving it at the table. This way, only those guests who actually want cake will take it. When you choose to do so, you can place the order for less than the actual head count, as it is pretty certain that not all your guests will want cake. The answer to this reader’s question on the cost of wedding cakes on the Knot suggests that for 300 guests, you can order just 150 slices of cake, and serve all your guests half-slices.  Again, if your wedding reception is for 300 guests and you are serving cake in a buffet setting, you can place the order for just 250 guests and it will most likely be enough.

#6 Choose the shape and flavors wisely

The most budget-friendly cake shapes are square and round. Square cakes are easy to section into equal portions without wastage. It is also comparatively easy to make. Most bakers can easily frost square cakes, just like they would with round cakes. So, that shouldn’t be a concern. If you choose any unusual shape for one or more of your cake tiers, you will have to spend more on it. Topsy-turvy cakes are the most expensive of the lot, since it not only takes a lot of effort to create, but there is a lot of wastage in setting up the tiers. So, either go with the square or circular cake and decorate it to meet your vision. Use options like varying the heights of the various tiers to obtain an equally interesting effect. Cakes that are shaped like real-life objects, like cars or books can cost extra. The alternative is to make the cake in a standard shape, and have the picture of the object printed on it in edible ink. It may not look the same, but neither will it be as expensive.

The other thing that can make a difference is the flavor. Standard flavors like vanilla and chocolate are loved by all, and cost much lesser than gourmet choices like carrot or cookies ‘n’ cream. Similarly, sponge cake is cheaper than fruit cake, but delicious. If you must have a premium flavor for your tiered cake, consider doing it for the smaller tiers and choosing standard fare for the larger tiers.

#7 Be creative with your decorations and display

butterfly cake

Remember how we suggested ribbon and fresh seasonal flowers for quick, efficient and attractive decoration? There are several other similar options that will help you have a beautiful cake at a budget-friendly price. Here are some of them:

  • Chocolate covered berries are delicious and look tempting, while the cost is almost insignificant
  • For a vintage theme, you can use ribbons and a decorative brooch for the cake decoration
  • Simple criss-cross designs on the cake surface with tiny edible silver dots are inexpensive, yet classic
  • Instead of fondant figurines, choose plastic figurines as cake toppers, and it will serve as a keepsake for the future as well
  • Choose inexpensive cake toppers like the butterfly toppers featured in the cake in the picture above, or try your hand at making a cake topper yourself, for a fraction of the cost of doing it in sugar
  • Instead of a tiered cake, you can have the separate tiers placed using pillars. This is usually much cheaper than a single tiered cake. It is also easy to set up and distribute

You can also cut a few corners with the way you set up your dessert table. Have a dessert station set up and spread the different desserts out for maximum effect. By varying the size and height of each platter, it will look abundant and interesting. Also space the desserts to look as though there is more than you actually have. Many couples splurge on an attractive cake stand, but you can get creative with this as well. If the venue has wedding cake platters and stands, use them creatively. Dress up the table with an attractive table cloth, interesting food labels and an interesting backdrop or buntings, so the focus is not on the cake stand. You can also go with unusual choices like distressed and weathered wooden crates for relevant themes. Just let those creative juices flow, and you will find several ideas that won’t cost you too much.

#8 Book early and get your cake at a better rate

pillar cake

Don’t delay your cake choices till last-minute. Start your search early, and you will most likely be able to snag a bargain or make use of a discount. Check if you can get a better deal if you make a full payment, or if you place your booking early. If your wedding day is after several months, booking your cake early may even allow you to lock the price at the current rate, before any price increase takes effect. It will also be one task off your list, so don’t delay. If there are any bridal shows in town, try to attend them and check out whether there are any cake makers offering attractive offers. Lastly, don’t forget to check if your venue or caterer offers a discount package on the cake, if you order it from them.

Now that you know all about how to get the best from your wedding cake budget, all you need to do, is to get started. Check out our list of cake vendors and their fantastic designs on Best for bride for some valuable inspiration or to place your orders, by clicking on this link.

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Tips to help you rent your wedding dress

Every bride dreams of a fantastic wedding day. And, it goes without saying that she sees herself as a ravishing beauty in a stunning wedding gown in her dreams.

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However, buying that perfect wedding gown may sometimes not be easy. As we all know, bridal gowns are expensive, and not everyone can afford the wedding dress of their dreams. So, what do you do in such a case? Do you settle for a cheap dress that fits your budget? Not necessarily. If you really want to wear a certain wedding gown, but can’t buy it, consider renting it for your big day. This way, you can wear your chosen wedding gown for a fraction of the price you would have to pay if you were to buy it. Of course, you wouldn’t be able to pass it on as a family heirloom, but you can at least be wed looking as grand as you always wanted to.

It is not just brides who can’t afford an expensive wedding gown that rent it. The article Weddings and the Sharing Economy on the Huffington Post suggests that more brides today are comfortable with wearing a used dress on their wedding day.  These include women who are environmentally conscious and want to minimize their environmental footprint by wearing a pre-loved dress. Another category are those who do not consider it worthwhile investing in a dress that they will wear just once in their lifetime.

For all these women, here are some tips to remember when you have to rent your wedding gown.

Rent from a reliable bridal store

Remember it is your wedding day, and you want your wedding dress to arrive on time. TO avoid any risks in receiving it, make sure you choose a reliable bridal shop. Go with references from friends and associates. Also check out the online reviews and feedback about the service that these shops provide, before you sign the contract.

Start shopping early

The one possible problem with renting a wedding dress is finding the one you want in your size. It is a good idea to start early and check out the different stores that offer the designer collection you desire, on rent.

Check for an all-inclusive package

Slight alterations such as taking in, bustle and adjusting hemline are usually included in the rental service at good bridal shops. Before you set your heart on a dress, talk to the bridal consultant and confirm whether this will be included in the rental charges.

Plan to rent matching accessories too

Since you will not be owning your wedding dress, it doesn’t make sense to invest a huge amount of money in bridal accessories that match this dress. In most cases, the shop will also rent matching accessories, and you can make use of this service at a much cheaper price than if you were to buy them.

Discuss the terms and conditions of the contract before signing it

Check out the clauses on the number of days you can keep the dress, whether it has to be cleaned before being returned and the damage charges you will have to meet. If in doubt, ask the shop and sign the contract only if you are comfortable with all their terms and conditions. Ask when you can pick up the dress, and whether there are any late charges. Once you sign your contract, don’t forget to follow up with the boutique before the wedding, so that your dress is prepared and ready on time.

Best for Bride allows brides to rent or buy their wedding dresses. For more details visit our online web store link or call your nearest boutique.

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Posing with your bridesmaids – how to make sure you have fabulous photos

bridesmaids

You can get some of the best possible wedding photos, when posing with your bridesmaids. Not only do these girls oblige to smile, pose and make the entire experience non-stop fun, they look great too.

After all the effort you’ve put into color co-coordinating their outfits and planning their look to the last detail, it is only worthwhile that you take some time to also think of how you want them in your wedding pictures. This allows you to make the most of the shoot, and avoid classroom style boring photos.

Check out these tips for getting the best wedding pics with your favorite girls, and see which of these can be added to your photography plan.

1.Plan in advance

Bridesmaids under Heather's veil
Image Credit: Blaise Alleyne, via Flickr, [CC BY 2.0]

You will of course have chosen your perfectly matched bridesmaids dresses, and bought the accessories. So, we aren’t bothering with that bit. What we are talking about is planning ahead, so your girls are ready on time, and will look great. Work with your planner (or do it yourself, if you don’t have a planner) to set up a schedule for the morning, and see to it that your girls are dressed on time. If any of the girls have a habit of being late, set up a different schedule for her. In all cases, add plenty of extra time, so there is no chance of not being ready on time. Put one of the super-organized girls in charge, so you needn’t stress, when you should be getting dresses yourself.

2.Have a hair and makeup trial well ahead of time

You do not want any nasty surprises on the big day. So, get your girls to join you on a hair and makeup trial, well ahead of your wedding day. You can make a note of what can be improved, any hiccups that can cause delays, and make changes to the plan accordingly. This will also give you a chance to see how the girls will actually look, rather than just go with a general idea and feel disappointed if you do see what you expected.

3.Share the list of photos you must have, with your photographer

There is plenty of inspiration for unique photo ideas on this board on Pinterest. You are bound to find a few poses that you simply must have. Note them down, and share them with your photographer, so he remembers to capture them on your special day. Also include combination photos with bridesmaids and groomsmen, bridesmaids and groom, with special accessories you’ve ordered for the occasion or fun poses. Make sure you have a healthy mix of orchestrated and action shots, so you do not miss on any of the fun, even while getting everyone in focus.

4.Plan their bouquet positions and other details ahead

Bridesmaids 5
Image Credits: outreachr.com, via Flickr, [CC BY 2.0]

This makes all the difference between good and great photos. Find a comfortable pose for your ladies, where they all hold the bouquets at the right height so their posture is good, and the pictures will look splendid. If there is a special design feature on their dresses, like a keyhole back, or you’ve chosen colorful shoes or umbrellas to complete their look, get these finer details captured on camera.

Visit us at Best for Bride, to choose the best bridesmaid dresses for the biggest event in your life. Browse through our gallery today, and find those that will work best for your wedding.