Once you wear your wedding gown on your wedding day, your transformation into a bride is almost complete. There are few things left to do now, before you walk down the aisle. But before you step into your dream wedding dress, there are a couple of things you should first complete. This is what we will look at today. Here is a list of must-do’s before you finally wear your bridal dress, and are ready to walk down the aisle.
If you thought wedding gown shopping was stressful, just wait till you start looking for your bridesmaids dresses!
Finding the right dresses for all your girls, so they not only fit into the wedding scene beautifully, but are also satisfied with your choice, can be a little too difficult to achieve. It is a challenge alright, but one that is possible to deal with. And, we are here to help you with it today.
Go with these 10 tips listed here, and you will feel the stress of bridesmaid dress shopping lifted in a big way.
#1 Remember that one dress needn’t fit all
Unfortunately, there is no single dress style that will look good on every woman. Women are built differently, and every one of your bridesmaids will have her own unique built, height, size and color. So, choosing a single design for all your girls will usually end with one of them not looking too great. Also, it is no longer the trend to have matching bridesmaids. So, be ready to be flexible with your choices. Keep your mind on the big picture—you want a cohesive look that is interesting and attractive.
We suggest you look at dresses that are similar in two or three aspects and vary the rest of the features. For example, consider the same color and different designs, or different colors with the same design. You can also check out different dresses from the same designer collection. This way, the fabric colors will match, but your bridesmaids will each have their own unique look. One word of caution; don’t give your girls free reign to pick any dress that will fit the idea. This can end up becoming haphazard, and their overall look may not come together. It is better to stick to a certain set of criteria, and let your girls find dresses that suit them, while also meeting these requirements.
#2 Discuss budget upfront
Since your bridesmaids will be paying for the dress, you should discuss the budget with them, before you go shopping. Get a clear idea of what is the maximum they can afford to pay for their dress, and make sure you do not ask them to stretch it any further than that. Remember that the amount they suggest is usually inclusive of alterations and accessories, and it will be good if you can clarify this if you aren’t certain. Then, plan your shopping budget and do your dress research based on these numbers. Once you know the amount that your bridesmaids are ready to shell out for their dresses, you can search online. Look for collections that will give you what you want, in this range. Make the most of sales, discounts and offers.
At Best for Bride, we often offer discount on bulk bookings of more than a certain number of bridesmaids dresses. So, if you search around in advance and place your orders in one go, you will most likely be able to avail of such offers and help your girls get the best deal for their money. Also remember that it isn’t necessary that to use up all the money they are ready to spend. If you find dresses at a better bargain, I am sure they’ll appreciate it if they can keep the extra cash for themselves. So, be a considerate bride. Your bridesmaids will love you for it.
#3 Start early
Just like you spend months researching and planning your wedding day look, you will need plenty of time to find your bridesmaids dresses. So, start early, and do your research several months before the wedding. The benefit of starting early is that you can make the most of any sale or offer that comes up in the months leading up to the wedding. You should have sufficient time if you start seven to eight months before the actual date. Since you will already know what you want, it is just a matter of waiting for a good deal to come up. Research is a lot of fun, when you do it online, as you can see almost every dress that will be available in store, on the boutique website.
Once you order the dresses, you will still need time to have it altered and fitted, so it is perfect in time for your wedding day. 75% of women who buy bridesmaids dresses will need alterations. While this will mostly take just one appointment, it can also take two or more depending on the type of dress chosen. So, have your bridesmaids mark their calendars for dress appointments and alteration sessions well in advance, so everything progresses smoothly.
#4 Ask your girls for their inputs
Your bridesmaids may have ideas of what they would like to wear to your wedding. Welcome their opinions. Whether you take it or not is up to you, but it won’t hurt to ask. You can share your own vision of how you expect them to dress on the day, and then ask them for their suggestions. There are several digital apps like Pinterest and Evernote, where you can share pictures and ideas with each other. So, use this to streamline and collate all the information that your friends would like to share with you.
If there are certain styles that your bridesmaids would rather not wear at all, eliminate these from your selection. Not all girls are comfortable wearing strapless dresses or ones that are too short. So, stay away from such choices unless you know they won’t mind wearing it. The same goes for colors too. Not all colors may look good with all skin tones, and if your bridesmaid is worried that she will look sickly or washed out in a particular hue, it will be good if you choose an alternative that will work. If there are silhouettes that they think would be best on them, you can plan the overall look based on it. When you know their preferences, you can choose a dress that they will get the best out of. Dresses in universally flattering colors and in silhouettes like A-line or with V-necklines look good on most body types.
#5 Go shopping by yourself the first time
This is a simple way of ensuring that your opinions are not side-lined, and you can actually see what is available. Book the first appointment with the salon and attend it by yourself or just with a friend, say, your maid of honor. We think this is essential, because some dresses that you may have shortlisted online, may look entirely different when seen directly.
So, rather than hauling all your girls down and discovering this, it helps if you do a test run yourself and make sure that what you had in mind is what you see in person. If you do not have any specific designs in mind, and intend to go with what is available in shop, you can discuss your ideas one-on-one with the shop assistant, and find out what she has to suggest. Bring the girls in later, and the actual appointment will be a lot easier. Remember that it has to be your decision finally, so prepare for the options and you will make it in a much wiser way.
#6 Ask your girls to mark their calendars, well in advance
Not all your bridesmaids may be the super-organized or easily available. So, every extra inch of time will help you with your bridesmaid dress shopping. Once you have a general idea of what you want, or perhaps have even picked out the lot that your bridesmaids will be selecting from, don’t delay getting your girls to the shop. Fix a date and ask them to make themselves available at the said time.
If you have a relatively large bridal party, with more than 4 or 5 bridesmaids, it may be a good idea to break them up into two lots. This will help you focus on those who are there at each appointment, rather than make it a noisy and busy affair. Our suggestion is that you make your picks during your first appointment session and only show these to the bridesmaids, to choose from. This way, there will be no chances of swaying too far from your opinion, and you will get the cohesive effect you wanted, in the end. Once the dresses are picked, the shop assistant will measure your girls and suggest alterations. So, schedule their fitting appointment right away, so you can get that out of the way.
#7 Delegate duties to your most reliable friends
With a wedding to happen, we know how you will be buried under wedding planning tasks. Remember that you needn’t handle each and every detail by yourself. This is why you have a Maid of Honor and bridesmaids in your team. Delegate the responsibility of getting the girls to their dress fitting appointments, paying their dress bills on time and receiving their dresses in time for the wedding. It will be one job off your shoulders, and you can spend the saved time on something else that deserves personal attention.
If your Maid of Honor isn’t the right person to handle this task, there should be someone else on the bridesmaid team, who can do it for you. Hand over this responsibility to her instead. To be on the safe side, make sure that you check on the arrangements once in a while, so everything progresses as per plan and your bridesmaids all have their dresses in time for the wedding.
#8 Don’t stress too much over your decision
If you are the ultimate perfectionist, we know how you can easily feel overwhelmed by the hundreds of choices out there. Yes, wedding planning is a little monster, where you never know for sure whether the choice you made was actually the best one available. But, don’t sweat it!
At least in some areas, good enough is enough! So, don’t loose sleep over your bridesmaids dress selections too much. Take it light and go with what you think is good without too much deliberation. Make the most of your inspiration boards and what your shop assistant suggests, and it will most likely work out well.
#9 Accessories will complete the look
The overall look will also be determined by the accessories you chose for your bridesmaids. You have to choose bouquets, jewelry and shoes. Reusable choices are the best, as it will help your friends make their money go further. Choose neutral colors and designs that flatter everyone on the team. You can even mix and match them up, so each girl has her distinct look but still blends in well with the rest of the team.
If you feel uncertain about your dress choice, you can always dress it up or down by the apt choice of accessories. If your bridesmaids dresses were expensive, it would be very considerate if you pay for the accessories. This could double up as your bridesmaids gift too. Work with your imagination and draw inspiration from the various pictures you may have seen in magazines and online. Make sure that the accessories, hair and makeup, all come together and look attractive and suitable for your wedding theme.
#10 Remember you cannot always make everyone happy
Your bridesmaids may not always be happy with what you want them to wear. If this is the case, you may feel worried about forcing your choice on them. If you have tried your best by choosing within budget, adjusting your priorities to accommodate their likes and cannot help any further, just stop trying to make it work!
Bridesmaids should realize that it is the bride’s likes that get priority, and that they were prepared to accept it when they signed up for the role. So, don’t feel too guilty as you have to stick to your vision of how the wedding day should look and be. It’s your lifetime celebration after all, and you don’t want it to be different from what you always wanted, just because your friends aren’t too happy with your decision.
At Best for Bride, we have a comprehensive and extensive collection of bridesmaids dresses from several designers. Check it out today, and we are sure you will find dresses for all your bridesmaids in our collection.
Image Credits: Madeleine Ball, via Flickr, CC BY 2.0
Take a minute to think of the many wedding receptions you’ve attended, and tell us how many of the toasts and speeches were truly memorable! Wedding speeches are considered an essential part of almost every wedding reception. With all eyes on the speaker, it can be a frightening experience for some. Now, if you are the best man or Maid of Honor, writing a wedding toast is definitely on the cards. So, when the couple ask you to honor them by speaking a few words on their wedding day, it can be one of your worst nightmares come true–unless you have always been great at public speaking or have always prepared for this opportunity! Nevertheless, it isn’t too difficult to prepare and deliver an effective toast with a few essential guidelines. In this article, we will look at tips for both the couple who have to decide who all speak at their wedding, as well as for the people who have to deliver these speeches. So, fear no more and read on to find out how to go about it.
Who usually performs a wedding toast?
Image Credits: Nan Palmero, via Flickr, CC By 2.0
The traditional practice is for the best man to toast the bride and Maid of Honor to toast the groom. So, they will mostly be the two people who the audience expect a speech from. So, if you have gladly accepted either of these roles, remember that you may have to speak on the day. If you are really uncomfortable speaking in front of an audience, it may be a good idea to mention this to the couple in advance, so they can plan accordingly.
Apart from these two people, there are many others who may and usually will speak at the reception. This usually includes the parents of the bride or groom (mostly the father), especially if they are hosting the wedding. Then, there may be other relatives or friends who would like to honor the couple with a brief message. The groom will also be expected to say a thank you note during the reception.
Tips for the bride and groom
#1 You do not need wedding toasts unless you are absolutely sure you do
We spoke about who are the people expected to give wedding speeches. This is the usual norm, but there is no compulsion to stick to it. The team on A Practical Wedding blog tells you to buck this traditional cast, if you want something different. Remember is that there is no need to have a toast at all. If you feel that it would be better this way, so be it. On the other hand, if you would like this to be a part of your reception, go for it. Don’t forget to think of how comfortable the person giving the toast would be. If it’ll be a nightmare for them and they would prefer to stay away from the stage, it is best to avoid it than embarrass them with doing something they hate, for your sake.
#2 Think well over who you should confer this honor on
You can imagine how inappropriate it would sound if the person at the mike were to start the speech with something like, “ I am not so close to the couple,” or something similar. Even worse, imagine how it would be if the speaker went on to embarrass the two of you with his inappropriate wit. So, make sure that the people who are invited to toast you are those who will do justice to the role. The best way is to choose people who are really dear to you, and ask them whether they would like to speak at your wedding. It is best to not compel anyone who is even remotely uncomfortable, as not everyone may be confident about speaking out aloud in front of many guests. If someone would like to think over it, give them enough time to come to a decision.
#3 Ask all those you love, not just those who are good at speeches
Is there someone in your wedding party who you would love to do your wedding toast, but haven’t asked because they’ve always shunned away from speeches? Why don’t you just ask them? Even the most reserved people often rise to the occasion, if they are really close to you and wouldn’t want to miss the chance to say a few special words on your big day. After all, they may make an exception for you as a few lines they say would be more meaningful to you than an impressive speech by someone who isn’t as close? So, don’t hesitate, just ask. If they decline the offer, you will still be better off asking than never knowing if they’d have liked it.
#4 Leave it to them entirely
Wedding toasts and speeches are supposed to be prepared in advance, but not with the approval of the couple. That spoils the entire intent. Rather than knowing everything that will be said and spoken, wouldn’t you prefer the surprise of hearing what your dear ones have to say about you, right when they say it? Lay off the pressure, and they will most likely do a great job. So, trust yourself when you choose the person to speak on the day, and then leave it to them to do the rest.
#5 Accept what you hear gracefully
Whether someone declines to deliver your wedding toast, or the toast doesn’t sound as impressive as you would have wanted it to, don’t feel bad about it. Remember that although the guest you asked is dear to you, the reason they don’t want to do a toast is not because they aren’t fond of you. It could just be that they aren’t comfortable speaking in public. And where the content of the speech is concerned, keep and open mind, pay attention and be happy for what was said. Don’t expect their speech to take a certain direction or be similar to what they’ve previously delivered on another occasion.
Now, that we’ve covered the part of the couple, let us move on to the other part of our discussion. Let us look at what makes an interesting wedding toast, and how you can prepare for it when assigned this important duty.
What makes an interesting wedding toast
#1 Start with a punch
Since you do not have forever to impress, it is necessary to pack your wedding toast with punch right from the beginning. For this, keep the message short, crisp and effortless. A quote, short verse or poem or a joke when chosen appropriately will help you grab the audience attention instantly.
#2 Keep it brief
The most memorable messages are short and sweet. Convey your best wishes to the couple in a personal way that they will appreciate, and finish it off quickly before anyone is too bored to listen any more. Even if you have known the couple for ever, and have lots of stories and trivia to discuss, this is not the right occasion. If you must, stick with one instance and leave it at that. Toasts and speeches that end in 5 minutes are usually best.
#3 Don’t sound too impersonal
The reason you have been chosen to say a speech is because you mean a lot to the couple. So, make sure your message is personal and from the heart. There is no harm in borrowing ideas off the internet or a magazine, but let the gist of the message be your own and make sure you say it with emotion, so it is worth remembering. If you have trouble remembering the lines, note it down,but never read it entirely. Keep it as reference, just in case you forget where you were going.
#4 It is alright if it isn’t funny
You know how everyone has that impression that the most memorable speeches have humor in them. If you are naturally humorous or can lace a joke into your message, definitely do so. But, never try to add humor just for the sake of sounding funny. It can sound like you are trying too hard, and may do more damage than good. Also, it is best to avoid personal and embarrassing jokes, that may not be appropriate for the situation.
#5 Don’t brag or insult
This is not the occasion for you to announce how hard you’ve had to work behind the scenes of the wedding, or what you’ve done for the couple. Keep the focus on them and also appreciate anyone else worth commenting. Never use your wedding toast as a chance to insult either the bride or groom, bring up past relationships or say anything offensive at all.
#6 Don’t be too nervous
If you are not very fond of public speaking, we can imagine how terrified you may feel. Remember that with practice, you will be better prepared to handle the situation. Prepare your script in advance, and practice it well. Don’t stress too much over how it will turn out. And when you are up for the act, don’t allow anyone’s reactions get to you. Just go with what you prepared, don’t make any last minute changes that may get you stuck with your lines, and you should be safe.
#7 Keep the audience in mind when preparing your speech
Although the actual intent of the toast is to congratulate the newly wed couple, thank all the people who made the wedding a success with a few extra lines thrown in, and make sure that those extra lines are relevant to the audience. If your speech contains instances that all the audience are unaware of, they can end up confused and perhaps, even bored. So, if you must share a story about the couple, make sure there are no loose ends. Additionally, it is necessary that you introduce yourself and add a brief line about how you are related to the couple, so all the listeners know who you are.
#8 Maintain eye-contact and speak slowly
Unless you are a seasoned expert, these factors needn’t come to you easily. However it is important, as this will help the audience follow all that you say and enjoy your speech much better. Look at the people around you, and specifically at the bride and groom when you mention them. Speak loudly and coherently, and speak slowly so everyone can easily follow what you say. If you speed through your lines, it can cause confusion as not all may follow what you said. So, remember the three golden words—slow, steady and clear.
#9 Conclude with a punch, just like you started it
Don’t let your enthusiasm wane as you reach the end of your speech. Make sure that you end your speech with a punch line that packs an impact, just like you planned the beginning of your speech. This is the right time to borrow an interesting saying, or use a quote that follows through with the rest of your speech, but lingers on in the minds of the listeners. Remember that there is only so much information that everyone will remember after your speech is over, and what you say at the end will mostly be the part that sticks. So, plan it well and you can create the impact you desire without much difficulty. Visit this article on Wikihow for some sample wedding speech endings to inspire you.
#10 Remain calm and contained even after it is over
You may feel like punching the air or even doing a somersault once your wedding toast is ever. Restrict the urge! Be calm and contained, and if you must, smile and let the feeling of a successful delivery sink in slowly. Save the antics for when you are alone, and you will end up making a much better impression.
That’s all there is to preparing and making a wonderful wedding toast. We told you it was simple and straightforward, didn’t we?
If you are planning a wedding in the near future, don’t forget to check out our online website for all your wedding needs. And, if you are attending one, you should check out our evening dress section for some great options.
Bridesmaids are the women who share the stage with you on your wedding day. This is a position that you should confer after thoroughly thinking it through. This is because they have an important role to play at your wedding; it is one where they will have to handle several responsibilities.
However careful or calculating you may be when choosing your bridesmaids, you can still end up with unexpected surprises or awkward situations in this area at different stages of the wedding planning process. Sometimes, the issues may crop up right from the time you start choosing your bridesmaids, at other times it may be an issue that suddenly popped up when you thought everything was progressing beautifully.
Here are some issues that brides have had to tide over, and let us look at the best way to handle each of them.
Q. Who to choose when you have more than one Bestie?
Enter Friends, with Monica who had to choose between Rachel and Phoebe, or Jules on Cougar Town with Ellie and Laurie! This is a situation we’ve seen time and again. If you have always been certain of who to choose as your Maid of Honor, and its been mutually agreed upon, lucky you! If not, do not worry, we have a few solutions for you to consider.
Q. What to do if a bridesmaid is pregnant or a new mom at the time of the wedding
Since you’ll be engaged for a long time, don’t expect all your bridesmaids to be in their current situations at the time of your wedding. They may or may not! However, having a bridesmaid who is pregnant or a new mom doesn’t have to change too many things. The best approach in this situation is to ask her what she would be comfortable doing. If your friend would still love to continue being your bridesmaid, trust her with it. If she is nervous and would prefer to back out, it is best to go with her choice. If your friend would like to continue in the role, make sure you do all you can so she is comfortable. You may have to make a few changes to plan when ordering her dress. It may have to be altered or you may have to choose it closer to the wedding. So, plan the logistics accordingly. Also, entrust her with light responsibilities, given her situation. She will already be handling a hundred extra things of her own, so don’t stress her out with more than she can handle. Just talk to her and find out all you can about how you can make things easy for her, and we are sure it will all work out well for both of you.
Q. When your bridesmaids hate the dress you chose
It is impossible to make everyone happy, and yes, it is your happiness that ultimately matters. So, if your choice for the bridesmaids dress doesn’t find favor with the girls, you can still stick to it. All the same, remember that there are several ways in which you can work around this and find a choice that they can be happier about.
Many brides make the mistake of choosing bridesmaids dresses in unusual colors, that many girls find unappealing. The mix and match bridesmaids look is one of the best ways to tide over this issue and get you what you want, while your bridesmaids are also happy. You can keep two or three factors uniform, like the color, neckline, hemline or designer collection, and allow your girls to choose any dress they like as long as these factors are met. Find out how to do this right, by checking out this previous article of ours. The other way is to go with a neutral color or universally flattering pattern and step up the style with colorful accessories or bold fashion items. Here are some suggestions for some colors that work this way in this post.
Spend some time researching your options and be open to ideas that fit in with your wedding aesthetic. You may not only find a choice that everyone adores, but it may also give you something unique that sets your wedding apart. Also ask your bridesmaids if they have any suggestions and then make a choice that nobody can totally hate. This way, you’ll be happy and so will your bridesmaids.
Q. Your bridesmaids think they are paying too much for everything
When a bridesmaid agrees to be one, she knows she signs up to spend some money for your wedding. So, it is part of the deal. Nevertheless, it is up to you to be reasonable about what you choose, so you don’t make your friends regret their decision later. This bridesmaid voices her concerns, in this post on Apartment Therapy, and she tells us how difficult it is for her to cough up all the money she is expected to spend for her friend.
Remember that this applies to your bridesmaids too. They have to pay for a dress which they may never wear again, pay for the bridal shower and wedding gift, hair, makeup, accessories, and these things can quickly add up. So, if you value your friendship, it is only right that you are understanding and either stick to reasonable plans where they have to pay only what they can afford, or volunteer to pay for anything extravagant. The best approach is to have options for everything from the dress to the gift, and allow them to pick from the choices based on their comfort. Your wedding shouldn’t leave any of your friends in a financial crunch, and unless you have been on the receiving end with the same friends previously, it is only wrong if you do. If you think the dress price exceeded your idea, or if they have paid more than they expected to, you can always buy them their accessories like shoes or jewelry and take that burden off them. They deserve it for all the hard work (and money!) they are putting in to make your day extra-special.
Q. What to do when one of my bridesmaids just doesn’t get along with the rest
Your bridesmaids are a team, and they do have to spend some time together to plan their roles and responsibilities properly. Having a bossy bridesmaid or one who always seems to disagree with the rest can throw the entire situation into chaos. So, the first step is to recognize the likelihood of any such problems arising, before you pop your question to your bridesmaids. If there is a difficult friend in your list, consider whether it is more important that they be a bridesmaid than avoiding arguments among your bridesmaids. If you think it is, you may have to take on an active role to avoid potential problems. This article on Huffington post gives some practical solutions in this regard. Firstly, avoid tricky situations that can lead to friction. You can delegate responsibilities like the shower to a particular person, even outside the bridesmaid group to avoid arguments. Delegate only specific responsibilities to her, so she won’t have to cross paths with an opponent. Pair her off with those who can handle her with tact. Finally, before your wedding day, sit her down and personally ask her to put aside her differences and cooperate, so your day goes well. If she cares even an ounce for your happiness, she will handle it well and make sure that the excitement of your day is not ruined due to her petty and unnecessary problems.
Q. What to do when a bridesmaid can’t keep the wedding planning details a secret
Whether it is because she is super-excited about your wedding, or simply jealous of what you have, it is simply wrong to tell others your wedding planning secrets. If your bridesmaid does this by mistake, let it go, but make sure to ask her nicely to never repeat it. Despite this, if she continues with gossiping, it may be better if you act immediately. If you wait too long, she can cause your wedding surprises to be ruined by her inconsiderate behavior. Aim for a solution where you involve only those who can keep their thoughts to themselves, in the planning. Don’t make it into a bitter problem and spoil the entire mood by arguing with the person who spills the beans every time. Be discrete and don’t give any details if she keeps asking you for what’s going on. If you want to handle it diplomatically, and not create any unpleasant situations, assign a generic project to her and leave her with it. Make sure it is one that won’t make a difference even if she goes around telling the town what is involved, and it’ll keep her busy from interfering with the rest.
Q. Is it alright if my bridesmaid lives far away and will be arriving just in time for the wedding
This isn’t too rare these days. After all, you may have friends right from the time you were a little girl, who are close to you despite the physical distance. Although it may not be easy to shop for the bridesmaid dress or plan the shower from long-distance, it is still possible. Where dress shopping is concerned, you can simply mail her the options or share links to the collection online, and ask her for her opinions. Once the choice is made, you should order it for her, along with the dresses for your other bridesmaids. For this you need to know her dress size. Make sure that your bridesmaid is measured by a professional seamstress, so you get the measurements right before ordering the dress. Since you will mostly be ordering all the bridesmaids dresses in one go and from the same dye lot, make sure you know this before you place the order. Once the dress arrives, ship it to her right away. This will allow her to get the alterations done, so it is ready to be worn when she travels for the wedding. Where the bachelorette parties and bridal showers are concerned, it is up to your maid of honor and other bridesmaids to plan it. If you would like her to attend, see if it is possible to move these events closer to the wedding date. Since you want her to be involved in the wedding as much as the rest of the wedding party is, you can consider designating some day-of tasks to her. Nevertheless, remember that she may be tired from the journey and so accommodate that factor into the plans as well.
Now that we have most of the tricky questions addressed here, we think you are covered for most scenarios. If you think there are any more likely situations that you want help with, write to us and let us know.
For your bridesmaids dresses, we suggest you take a look at our extensive collection of bridesmaids dresses here on Best for Bride. With exhaustive collections in all sizes and designs from leading designer brands, you are bound to find the right dresses for all your bridesmaids by visiting us.
